Nostalgia choking sight

Got bored in class today and started looking at my old AOL emails and Gmail Emails. Found some stuff that made me smile. Found some stuff that made me cry. It was very interesting.

I've realized how much I've changed.

I've realized how much I haven't changed.

Since college I've thought that the high school friends were the "petty" relationships. They were superficial and not real. But, I think i've proved myself wrong. I love my college friends/family. They're wonderful. But they don't know me like my home friends do (all three of them..). They don't know my family. My house. How theres NOTHING to do in Short Pump. I mean.. I can create new stuff with them.. but its not the same. I think I got things mixed up..

I also saw a lot more exboyfriend stuff than I wanted to. Really good/cute things. And then the awful. I got really uncomfortable when I read that one.

I saw friends who I haven't thought of in years. I remembered words I used to say. Things I used to think about. I feel like the past was so solid. I feel very shaky about the present. But is that how it works? The present is unbalanced until its the past? Then it firms and hardens?

Haha the best was one chat conversation in which I liked four boys at once. That was my delimma. HAH!

Time to go act. Shows almost done. VERY sweet/sour. The good thing is I got cast in Dark Play for next semester :) that makes me very very happy.

I might update with more thoughts on the past..